Here is a preview from the beginning of my next P&P variation, Mr. Darcy to the Rescue-still in draft form.

“You are too hasty sir! You forget that I have not yet made an answer—“
Mr. Collins waved his hand airily. “We may dispense with these formalities. We both know how you shall respond.”
“We do?” Elizabeth expected smoke to be streaming from her ears by now.
“Yes, I have spoken with your most excellent father and he assured me how felicitous he found this event.” He graced her with a smile which was presumably intended to be charming, but which oozed insincerity.
“He did?” Elizabeth found these words hard to credit.
“Indeed. I assured him that our union is already a foregone conclusion since we are united of one mind and one heart.”
“We are?” Elizabeth could not stay silent any longer. “Pray, sir, when did that happen?”
Mr. Collins merely looked bemused. “I…do not believe I can supply you with the exact date…”
Elizabeth shrugged. “I keep a journal. I shall have to go back to see if I recorded the date.” She tapped her lip with her finger. “I hope it did not escape my notice.”